November 2018 ~ stars and moon

Thursday, November 29, 2018

She loved him
He loved her
Seems to good to be true

Some parents fail to understand the difference between oppression and love

I thought the person who i love is going to get married
After having a un necessary mental break down i decided that i would confess my love to him anyway hoping for atleast a rejection.
Turned out he wasn't actually getting married
He was just pranking everyone

And everything was awkwardly ever after...

With just you around
Your heart beat is the only sound

i cant help but wonder why.....why does it feel like i'm about to die

i cant help but wonder why
why does it feel like i'm about to die

why am i not able to decide
between facing challenges and suicide

why is it forbidden to cry
so no one even bothers to try

i cant help but wonder why
why does it feel like i'm about to die

why every happiness in other i see
brings chills to my body with envy

why do every sorrow i see
seems like they have been cursed by me

i cant help but wonder why
why does it feel like i'm about to die

why does every breath i take
is just not for my own sake

why does every "no" i say
taken as disrespect and despair

i cant help but wonder why
why does it feel like i'm about to die

-mariha

a daughters letter to her father

dear dad,

you dont know how its like to be a women .i dont think any man has fully ever understood it . so here is something i could never tell you personally.
honestly you are the best man i know and i believe that you will be forever. but it is not enough.
you dont know the truth actually
no women should ever wish that if they were born a boy things would be easier....the moment a girl has wished that you know that the little girl is gone.you can no longer protect her.nothing you say will make her feel better because she has already come in terms with the truth that society will treat her brother better than her.....her achievements will go unseen by everyone..they will all make her feel that her brother was born privileged because he is just a boy and she is not because she is just a girl.....the word just in both cases will ruin her pure innocent mind....because people forget to treat her just as human as her brother is........
no girl should ever feel that they never wake up again from sleep because it is the easy solution to the non existing, instead an exaggerated problem that she should not be worth any good just because she is a girl....
dad.....i think i have lost the purity ,the innocence of my mind ,everything i believed is not true anymore and i cant take it cause i am dying mentally....and i am scared i might die actually ,that i might be okay to be dead. that maybe it will be easy if i didnt exist because people already treat me like i dont exist....
and if i am gone i know you would lose your mind but i would have wished for you to care more when i was alive...
i would have wished that you stand up for me instead of them
i would have wished for you to care enough
i would have wished for you to be different just because you are my father...

-with love
your favorite child

-mariha

Sunday, November 18, 2018

if humans didnt find anything to complain about the world..
then what would be the difference between the earth and heaven

a million words would not bring you back, i know because i have tried
neither would a million tears, i know because i have cried....

if you get tired, learn to rest ,not to quit

"nobody can teach me who i am .you can describe parts of me, but who i am - and what i need -is something i have to find out my self...."

i believe that if life has given you lemons then you should make lemonade and find some one whose life has given them vodka and party with them

it is better to have nobody then have somebody who is half there.

your job was to stay

i'm done

what if i fail

he is gone

suddenly

suddenly we are 20 something and screaming to all the songs you listened to in middle school and everything is different now but you can't do anything about it

celebrate your own victories because no one else understands what it took to accomplish them....

some days life is good other days its like looking both ways before crossing the road and then getting struck by lightening

"in the morning do you prefer milk or juice"

i prefer no question ...thank you!"

morning routine for a good day

my morning routine includes me sitting in the bed for 30 min thinking about how tired i am!!!

can't wait for the holidays........... i just love telling all my family members i still don't know what i am doing with my life

and.....

and if you are ever lonely again just look at the moon.......
someone, somewhere is looking at it too...........

starsss

everytime you look at the stars .its like opening a door.you could be anyone,anywhere. you could be yourself at any moment in your life......................
you open that door and realize that you are the same person beneath the same stars...
camping in the backyard at eleven.driving alone.stopping at the edge of the city, looking up at the stars, walking a path ,riding a rowboat ,staring out the window of a car, you're eleven again.out here where the world begins and ends,its like nothing ever stops happening........

life

my entire life can be described in one sentence : it didn't go as planned and that's okay...

survival is not beautiful

survival isn't beautiful.....
it is fire,ache and everything combined

future

i am putting together a future for me that gleams with the lights of cities i haven't seen .....that exhibits the art.my hands tremble to create that looks like everything i haven't written a poetry about...

-noor

i was in pain

don't own credit

he is gone

there is no us

whats a soulmate!

i hate myself

i should hate you

hope

maybe somethings are not fulfilled in the world
but it doesnt meant you cant hope for it in the heaven...........

wings

the idea of cant is absurd
there always is a chance to try
us humans are not born with wings but we can always sew some when we want to fly.........

sadness

my kind of sad starts with an unfinished poem and ends with tear stained crumbled paper

forgiveness

forgiveness only came empty because it returned as an emotion of relief to others....
and relief was already a very beautiful shade of blue.....

something about you

there is something about you...
something TOXIC that lures me in even if i know you are a bad addiction you still make me compromise every single time for that one last smile........

part of you

everyone who is in your life is meant to be a part of your JOURNEY
but not all of them are meant to stay.....

i am in love with you

dont own credit for the video

losing someone

dont own the credit

out of control

There's nothing you can do overall
Cause now i'm going out of control

My dreams are outrageous,limitless or maybe careless
I could be a popstar,comedian,speaker or maybe a home maker .....its none of your business

You keep talking,i stop breathing and loose all my senses
Stay out of cause its none of your business

I could graduate at thirty,marry at forty or die at fifty
I could vote,love or even hate .and your opinion is prohibited strictly

I'm pure in my intentions, no need to go to a shrine
And i don't even color inside the line.

- mariha

masterpiece

Gonna break my heart a million times
Gonna loose my mind cause now it became a crime

To dream out my life
Like holding my neck in front of a knife

They say i'm worthless and weak
But i'll keep climbing to the mountain peak

You could try, but i wouldn't stop
Cause i like the view from the top

I'm gonna prove them all wrong
Fulfill my dreams, i know it not gonna be long

Gonna go through and get over all the dirt and grease
And i'm calling it my masterpiece.

-mariha

you broke me

don't own the credit for you

tell me you didnt cheat on me again

don't own the credit for the video

then you whispered that you loved me

i don't own the video

the girl who notices 2

so what if no one can hear the screams beneath her smile
so what if no one can see the darkness she is surrounded with
so what no one is bothered to know the pain she feels...
she will stand on her own.she always did.she will find her way out of this darkness towards light and with the light comes the healer to lessen her pain.....she just needs to stay there for a moment now.
she needs to learn to live with her fear...
for now, she will stay down .but when she gets up back on her feet she will not go back....
so what if she has no one now.she never needed anyone and she will never because at the end of the day only she can get herself out of this.
she will come back better stronger and this time a bit more smarter.
she was fool, the last time for falling into the same mistake again....

-mariha

i just need the pain to be gone

don't own credits for the video

when a boy tells he loves you

i don't own credit for the video

i see the way you look at him

credit to the one who made this video............

the truth

whenever you are looking for an answer to a question or a solution to the problem....always search from the core of the problem....the real problem is never what it appears to be ,its always hidden somewhere .its hidden in the question itself

-mariha

maybe

maybe you don't see people looking at you because you aren't looking at them
maybe you don't hear all the good things people say because you are too focused on the bad.
maybe you are a lot more wonderful,beautiful and special than you ever give yourself credit for

flashback

It is said that time heals everything
time has been gifted with the power to make people forget

but even so it is not capable of permanently erasing it
leaving everyone even with the hint of regret

darkness has such an impact on people even
the positive of people are lured towards it then

it never stops ,it always come backs to you not letting you go on
haunting you down ,never letting you completely move on

always reminding you of the lesson you were taught.

mariha

by myself

Have you ever felt so lonely in the presence of someone you know so well
you expected to be held, expected a hand to pick you up when you fell

you are taken for granted again and again
redoing ,reliving the history for the same reason

i try to stop it but they all take control of my story
missing a part of me that was blessed with that glory

unspoken words, they are all screaming inside
they all are transparent... , despite i hide

don't want to be someones "mission sympathy"
gonna preserve the real me , the real personality

going to stand strong, stiff and still
till i can work my way up without those sleeping pills....

no, no i am not fine not retarded either and my dignity is not for you to
sell
..... but.....
Have you ever felt lonely in the presence of someone you know so well.......................!

-mariha

you....

I never planned to get involved, i never planned on walking through those doors, i never planned going down those roads but most of all i never planned on meeting you....

I know you would have never noticed me, i knew you wouldn't care i knew you wouldn't smile at me or make eye contact because i was the thorn in the garden of roses

but meeting you was new, meeting you was a start, meeting you was the best thing that ever pain to me...

i was lost in the woods shivering in cold ,looking for a place to hide from all the pain and the sorrow that the world caused me

i almost gave up on life , on the hope that things might get better, on the hope that i might smile again.

but then...

you walked on my life just like the dawn after dust, like the sunlight after rain

you made me happy ,you made me feel loved in ways i never thought love never existed, you thought me to find happiness in the darkest of times, you made me feel alive, you were the reson i woke up each morning,it was your kisses that mended my soul, it was your touch, your finger tips that raised my heartbeat. it was you in every breath of mine.

now i just sit by the fire place holding those memories of ours in the
photographs of ours,broken and damaged just the way you found me.................!

-ankita

the way!

Its easy to run down hill,
momentum and gravity will even help to ensure you to get there faster.

but to climb a mountain you are often forced to take one step at a time,fighting the same resistance that wants you to turn back....

This is why we can only ever run from problem.
and this is exactly why we can only ever walk towards that solution,
one slow step at a time up hill.

But before you decide to turn and run remember that,

THE EASY ROAD DOWN DOESN'T COME WITH A VIEW.........!

again

i just dont know,
if i want to do it again.
get close to someone
so they can leave all over
Again.

i know its over
before it really began
but in my heart,
it was so real

if only you knew
how much these
little moment felt,
would you still have done the same?

and then it started to fall apart again and again.......

could this mean that
when things are falling apart
they might actually be falling into place
-ankita

thank you!

There are a lot of people in the time of happiness.but who surrounds you at the time of need is the one you never let go.....
so thank you for sticking by me
with me
for me
Even when all i did was push you away..thank you for having faith in me when i lost it.
Thank you for seeing things that i was too blind to see.......
Thank you for seeing the pain behind my anger..................
the heartbreak behind my rage
the tears behind my fake smile
Thank you seeing the unspeakable suffering that everyone else was too blind to see.....
Thank you for gluing me together when i was broken into pieces............
most importantly
Thank you for loving me when i was encapsulated within the darkest of clouds.....
so
Thank you i couldn't have made it without you.........!

-ankita

the girl who notices

she sits in a chair at the corner of the room and notices everything...no wonder she finds about everything.she sees friendship
she sees envy
she sees love
and she sees pain
she notices those lonely eyes
and those painful smiles..........
she watches two best friend that become incomplete in the absence of either.she watches two people in love remain so loyal to each other.she watches the girl in the first bench of her class give all the correct answers. she watches the guys that she loves fall in love with none other than her own friend .she is in love with a guy she would never tell the world about....and the worse she sees herself falling from her own heights that she created throughout the years.
she is not jealous..she is just envious
she wants friendship
she wants love
she wants to handle pain
she wants cheerful eyes
and happy smiles..

no she is not jealous ..she is just envious....

-mariha.

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Sunday, November 18, 2018

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Monday, November 12, 2018

always reminding you of the lesson you were taught.

Saturday, November 10, 2018

THE EASY ROAD DOWN DOESN'T COME WITH A VIEW.........!

Friday, November 9, 2018

no she is not jealous ..she is just envious....

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